Here we go.
My first post. I rather wish it was something a bit more profound…
This is a topic that I am sure has been discussed before, but I’m feeling…annoyed. Tired. Irritated. Pissed the hell off.
I cannot understand why.
I cannot understand why women bitch and moan about a “douche bag” of a man but continue to try and try and stay with them because they “know he can change.”
This isn’t all women, mind you. But some of the smartest ones are holding on to that tiny shred of stupidity.
I will share a bit of my recent experience with this.
So I met a woman recently who seemed very interesting and highly intelligent. I had recently dropped completely out of the dating scene, deciding not to try and meet anyone else when I met this one. I shall refer to her as Subject 7. Why? Because I want to.
Anyway, I met her at her place of employment. I became fascinated with her and found myself stopping by her workplace just to talk to her. This went on for about two weeks. Finally I decided to give this whole meeting someone deal another go and I asked if she was single.
Her answer was no.
“Yeah, tell me about it,” she said with an exasperated sigh. This caught my attention. I got curious. But as far as I was concerned the whole thing was finished. I wasn’t going to pursue anything.
I had just gotten off work after a sixteen hour shift, so I went straight home after talking to her. It wasn’t until I was home that I realized she had slipped me her phone number. I never asked for it. I was surprised, to say the least but I went on to bed.
The next day while at a class for my job I decided to send her a text message. She responded by saying that she didn’t think I was going to text. Honestly I had considered not sending one for reasons of morality. Anyway we chatted a bit and I finally got around to asking what she meant.
And from there she told me about this douche bag of a guy that she was dating. She had moved to [EDIT] to be with him (she’s from another state in the Northern part of the U.S.) and so far, after a year of being with him, he had refused to meet her halfway. She was getting to where she had had enough of it.
Well I thought perhaps fortune was smiling on me finally, so I decided to continue talking with her.
Well, before I knew it…I was beginning to realize that she thought of me as a Beta.
I’m aware this is all rather vague, but I am tired, hung-over, and sick of thinking about it so I’m just hurrying through the whole thing to say what I’m about to say.
Last week I discovered that she had moved to [EDIT], closer to her job. She had been living in [EDIT] before that. Well I thought that was cool and whatnot. Closer to her job and closer to my house. Maybe we could start hanging out.
Until she told me yesterday that her boyfriend had talked to her about living with him and she had decided to do it. To continue to try, to give him another chance.
I haven’t stated here everything that she told me, but when she told me that…I lost it.
Like, literally lost it.
I exploded and lost my temper. I am not proud of that, but I had to let her know that I’m not some shoulder for the universe to cry on and that I’m not some weak little Beta that is content with being caught in the friend-zone. I told her exactly why I started talking to her and that I choose to be a nice guy because I feel that people deserve to be respected. I can be a dickhead, and I’m actually pretty damn good at it. And I showed her last night and for the better part of today just how good at it I am.
But she pissed me off. She led me on and on, constantly hinting that she was about to leave her boyfriend for something better. Now, I’ve had multiple failed relationships because of the fact that I come across as a weak guy that can be easily walked on and treated like dirt. They always seem to fail when I reveal just how not-weak I am. I choose to be the way I am because I don’t like to be a dick. Because I see in this world too many women being tricked into relationships with douche bags who end up developing Stockholm Syndrome and thinking they love these bastards.
Is it wrong of me to believe they deserve better? I don’t think so. I believe that some women like being treated like shit, but I also believe that there are some out there that don’t and don’t deserve the shit they take. Subject 7 is one of these, but she made a big mistake in doing to me what she did.
I will not be friend-zoned. Not now. Not ever. I am sick of being treated like the guy whose shoulder women can cry on. I am sick of being the one they flock to and bitch to about the shit in their lives.
Well guess what, Honey? Life is shit. Everyone has their fair share of problems, including me. But do I bitch about them to you? Do I cry and moan “oh woe is me?” If you have a problem with the way things are going in your life, change it! It’s not that difficult. All it takes is a little bit of effort on your part. If you’re with a douchebag of a guy that treats you like shit, then just end it. Don’t prolong your suffering. Don’t drag a random stranger into your drama and expect him to save you.
Don’t expect me to save you. I’m not your own personal fucking Superman. And don’t wonder to me why I’m suddenly pissed off at you. Of course I’m pissed! I’m pissed at myself for falling for this stupid shit. I’m pissed at myself for considering being a dickhead to women from now on. That’s not who or what I am, but I’m seriously thinking that’s what I’ll have to become in order for a woman to be attracted to me.
I’m sick of being asked for advice and then that advice being ignored. I take some pleasure from the fact that she does now realize that I’m not to be fucked with. “Beware the fury of the calm man.” I am laid back, quiet, and calm. But that’s because when my sanity is pushed and prodded, I snap and become a raging inferno. I’ve done well to keep it in check, but bitch…Don’t you fuck with my emotions.
I apologize for the lack of…well, significance to this post. It is basically a rant and I realize that, especially with the vulgarity I have included. It could have been much worse had I typed this up last night while I was binge-drinking.
Bear in mind that I am not a big drinker and that I was beyond pissed last night. I have recovered somewhat today and as I type this I realize that it is just another cliché woman-problem post. However…I feel that it needs to be said that there are millions of women out there with undiagnosed cases of Stockholm Syndrome. I mean, seriously. Why the hell else would they constantly subject themselves to the tortures of being in abusive relationships?
Dr. Illusion: Welcome aboard, Individual Lies. Your true journey to Alpha starts….now.
Please read this and send her a link to it. It sums things up nicely. My man Ace is brilliant. 100 Words of Hate